SSS: Year Two (Supernatural Spy School Book 2) Page 4

  "Dimitri. This...this..." I couldn't think of words.

  Does he know? About what my dad wanted?

  Moving close to me, he used his other hand to press it against my cheek, wiping away the single tear that left my right eye.

  "Your sister had mentioned that around this time was when your father passed away. When I mentioned the pink cabin and they explained about it, they said one of your dad's many wishes was to build you a pink house. He never got to achieve it, but in his letter, he hoped that one day, someone who loved you just as much as he did would build you one."

  Dimitri smiled tenderly, his eyes full of hope. "I know we've been dating for almost a year, and who knows the future with how unpredictable S.S.S. is. I thought about it for a few days, and I simply couldn't get the idea out of my head. We'd been brought together somehow, but...to be honest, I'd never felt so happy. Not since my mom died. That was all thanks to you bringing us together, and throughout this year, I've come to have intense feelings for you."

  His face began to grow red, but he took a shaky breath.

  "When we were apart, I realized just how much I missed you. I couldn't sleep and the other side of me was just as restless. We'd wonder if you'd be sleeping soundlessly or experiencing those nightmares of yours. I wanted to be there to hold you, kiss you, enjoy your cherry blossom, vanilla, mint scent whenever I could. You really have become an addiction and I truly don't want a cure from it."

  With a wide smile, he whispered.

  "You deserve so much. Especially with all you dealt with from a guy who didn't respect you. Who hurt you and took something I'm sure was important to you. The pain you endured from the town's ridicule to you dealing with your father's passing. I wished to make something with my bare hands that showed you just how much you've changed my life and the lives of the others. I wanted to create something sturdy that would reflect what I wanted our relationship to be. Not just between you and me, but with the others as well. This home is a reflection of the dream I have for our team and friendships, and no matter what obstacles we face in the next three years at S.S.S., this will be the one place we can return to, take a deep breath, and enjoy the safety it provides us from the rest of the world."

  He looked me right in the eyes. "And I wanted to fulfill your dad's wish, so when he comes back to check on you, he knows you have men who love and will protect you like he would if he were here."

  Now I was crying, the waterworks officially activating as tears rolled down my cheeks.

  Every year was always hard around summer. Scarlett and I didn't just come here for a normal vacation. It was our way to mourn the loss of our dad and for Mom to mourn losing the love of her life.

  He was our shield from the harsh things life loved to throw at us because we were a powerful, gifted family, but it never fazed us until he passed. These were the hard months that we recalled his love and remembered the pain he'd gone through before leaving this world.

  Adding in the breakup with Callister that still dug at me — not from the emotional detachment, but the rumors, back talk, mockery, and exclusion I felt during that time — it was these summer months where it all hit me at once and sometimes made it hard to breathe.

  I'd gotten used to spending my time here, every single year after Dad's passing, but to now stand here in front of one of the items he'd promised me and have that vision built by one of the men who I'd been dating for a year? It was mind-blowing and heart-moving.

  "Di...mitri," I sobbed, my lip trembling as I tried to wipe away my tears with my arm. "This...thank you."

  I couldn't begin to express how much this meant to me. How considerate this all was.

  My hellhound boyfriend built a pink cabin by scratch over the last six months while balancing classes from the toughest spy school in the world.

  All of this to make me happy. All because this man loved me.

  I wrapped my arms around his waist, hugging him as tightly as I could. It may have hurt him, but he didn't seem to mind as he hugged me back and kissed the top of my head.

  "Losing someone is hard, no matter how many years have passed. This will never replace what your dad would have made, but it’s a reminder of his vision for you and I hope each time you see this home, you remember the many good times you shared with your dad and that he's always watching and cheering you on from wherever he is," Dimitri whispered.

  I looked up to him with my watery eyes, giving him a little nod in agreement. His lips lightly brushed mine.

  I closed my eyes as he pressed his forehead against mine, the two of us staying there in a peaceful moment as the breeze passed and the sounds of the night continued to buzz away.

  He gently stroked my cheek, and I opened my eyes once more to look into his molten ones.

  "Want a little tour before we do other things?" he asked with a sweet grin.

  "Yes." I smiled in return, knowing exactly what he was implying.

  With another squeeze of my hand and tender kiss, we made our way to tour around my pink cabin home.

  A home envisioned by my father and manifested by those who wanted to carry the torch of love he left behind.

  3

  Summer Loving Dimitri

  "I'm going to kill Scarlett," I grumbled to myself. "Out of all the things she could have done to me. This is pure evil."

  Here I was, standing in the master bedroom washroom with Dimitri waiting for me in bed, and I was assessing one of the three skimpiest pieces of lingerie I'd ever owned.

  And I only say ‘owned’ because Scarlett had apparently bought a bunch of clothes, but had inconveniently only left three bundles of lingerie, all of which were thongs and string bras.

  Tossing the thong, I unraveled the last bra, only to determine that I really couldn't label it as one. The straps and clip were literally a string, and the apparent "cups" that held your breasts? At best, they were just nipple covers. At worst, you couldn’t even call them that, given that they were transparent...

  Staring at it merely aggravated me, and I tossed it in the same direction as the other thongs and string bras I'd given up on.

  Why wear anything at all?

  "Mewr."

  I blinked and looked over to where I'd tossed the string lingerie, only to see Star inspecting it.

  All it took was five seconds for her to start playing around with it, the skimpy bra ending up hanging off her unicorn horn.

  She looked over to me, noticing my gaze was on her.

  "Mewr?"

  "At least you'll have more use of it than me." I shrugged and looked around the washroom for something to cover myself in.

  What to wear? Should I go out like this? What if he thinks I'm desperate?

  After the house tour, I really wanted to reward him somehow. Obviously we were going to have sex whether I put a towel around my waist or walked out there naked, but I really did want to make this worthwhile.

  I bit my lip and thought about it, trying to create some type of plan that would work in this situation.

  Star walked over to my feet, proudly shaking her head to get my attention.

  "Do you want it off?" I asked. Crouching down, I reached to take the string bra off her, but she ran away to the door, beginning to scratch the surface with her little claws.

  "Hmm. Wait." Staring at the lingerie for a long moment, I finally groaned.

  Silver. You're a witch. Why don't you just make your own appealing lingerie?

  The thought alone made me feel like a complete idiot. I was so nervous about pleasing Dimitri that I forgot about my own abilities magic-wise.

  With a bit of focus and a snap of my fingers, I felt the magic wrap around my body. After the tingling stopped, I opened my eyes and looked back into the mirror, taking in the saucy white lingerie set that cloaked my body.

  Both the bra and underwear were made of lace; the bra was a little thinner than my normal ones, but at least it held my breasts up decently.

  The front of the bra had a rhinestone lock and little gems outlining the cups. The same little jewels hung at the base part of the bra, complementing my magic incantation symbols that hugged under my breasts and around my ribs.

  My thong had a rhinestone bow and the same outline of gemstones on the waistband.

  I had white lace stockings with the same pattern of rhinestones at the edge, and an almost-see through robe with white fur trim rested on my shoulders.

  Running my hands through my wavy hair, I took a longer look at my appearance. Now with my turquoise highlights back thanks to the magic usage, I really looked ready for Dimitri, but I was still nervous.

  I'm overthinking this. It's sex. I've had sex. I like sex...with the right person. So why am I so nervous about this?

  "Mewrrrrr." Star began to meow without stopping, sounding as if the world was coming to an end.

  "Oh." I'd completely forgotten about her. Poor uni-kitten must have felt trapped. "Hold on, Star."

  Since she wouldn't move from the door when I approached, I scooped her up and opened it, only to face a lovely pair of abs.

  Taking a moment to appreciate the six-pack that was inches from my face, I slowly peered up to see Dimitri looking down at me with an intrigued look on his face.

  "Mewr!" Star wiggled in my hand. I let her go and she dropped to the floor, running around Dimitri's left foot. He diverted his attention to her for a long moment, reaching down to take the string bra off her unicorn horn.

  I mentally cursed and looked to Star, who was more than happy to sit there and let Dimitri take it off her before she darted away to find her next victim, which ended up being one of her toys that she tackled.

  "This is?" Dimitri questioned.

  I returned my gaze to him, but from his smug smile, he knew exactly what it was.

 
"Don't make me explain," I groaned. "It was my sister! I'd never um...wear that."

  Dimitri chuckled and shook his head. "Nah. You like lingerie that cloaks your body well. Or at least covers the private aspects."

  He winked and took his time gazing down my body while his tongue slid over his bottom lip in desire.

  "H-how would you know that?" I mumbled quietly, my face burning red from his sudden attention. My heart was racing at this point, having had no time to prepare myself for this.

  "Don't tell me it’s one of these men chats you guys all have," I mumbled.

  Dimitri brushed away a few strands of my hair, tucking it behind my ear before he once again took me in slowly with his molten eyes.

  "I can tell from all the times I’ve cuddled with you. You're modest and don't want to lead anyone on. Once you're comfortable with someone, you don't mind wearing just a skirt and underwear, but that depends on how you feel. When you get nervous, you try to cover up more," he explained.

  "Stalker," I huffed, my face still burning up. "Don't say you found all that out through smelling me."

  "Nah," he assured me. "Simple observation and getting to know you."

  Brushing my cheek with his hand, I looked into his eyes.

  "What took you so long?" he asked.

  "I..." Debating whether to just admit why I took forever to decide what to wear, I glanced to the floor and took deep inhale, letting the breath out slowly.

  Don't be afraid to be honest with him.

  That was my gut instinct telling me what I needed to do. Dimitri had done so much for me and was always open about it. Why should I be afraid of telling him my insecurities?

  "I'm really nervous," I confessed. "Not about the act of sex itself. I just...want to make this really special and the string lingerie fiasco wasn't helping. I've been intimate with Yuriel and Ryuu, but I felt like they took the lead so I didn't need to focus too much. I want to appear more attractive and impress you, but this is all so new to me. Getting to just enjoy being flirty with you or the others. Having the chance to even consider what to wear instead of being in a situation where I don’t have any control. I've been letting my instincts control my actions, but I still haven't fully grasped that...um...that I'm free to love."

  Who knew if my words made sense, but they needed to be said.

  I didn't want to keep returning to the past, and I was sure this conversation was killing the mood in some way, but it was honestly how I felt.

  I was healing, growing, and learning thanks to him and the others, but there were still many aspects of myself and our relationships that I'd yet to explore and take in.

  "Sorry. This is probably silly." I gave him a sheepish smile but noticed his calm expression.

  "Analyzing and validating your feelings isn't silly," he whispered.

  He slipped his hand into mine and gently tugged me forward. We moved to the bed, and we both sat down.

  He kept his hand around mine before he shifted his position to look at me. "Can you promise me something?"

  "If it's something along the lines of not commenting on your smelling antics, then no," I teased.

  He chuckled, shaking his head but giving me a sensual kiss that made my toes curl. "No. I like your commentary," he breathed quietly.

  "Okay." I gazed into the depths of his eyes. "Then?"

  "This year at S.S.S., I need you to be more open with us."

  "Open? You mean with how I feel?"

  He nodded his head just slightly.

  I pouted my lips, unsure what he meant by it. "Why?"

  "We know little to nothing about what we discovered on your test results, other than you being a potential hellhound-angel-shifter-hybrid," he began. "I can't let you bottle your worries."

  "But..." I glanced down. "They're not important."

  He lifted my head up with his hand underneath my chin, making it impossible for me to glance away.

  "Silver." His voice expressed his seriousness. "I'm not joking about this."

  "I'm not understanding why I should be open? I mean...don't get me wrong. I love telling you guys stuff. I adore that I have four amazing boyfriends who are okay with me sharing my thoughts and insecurities, but...some are so embarrassing," I whispered the last sentence as I cringed at the comment. "Don't you think it's embarrassing for me to be nervous about sex? It's nothing new, and yet I spent a good hour trying to figure out lingerie. Well...I did forget that I'm a witch and could make it myself, but still."

  Dimitri acknowledged my words, allowing a few seconds of silence to shimmer between us.

  "To me, Silver, that isn't embarrassing in the slightest. You need to understand something. No one is perfect. Just because someone has had sex, doesn't mean they’re suddenly a pro and know what they’re doing."

  He released my chin but lifted my hand and pressed it against his chest. My eyes widened at his rapid heartbeat, feeling it palpitate against his chest walls as if he were running from his enemies.

  "I'm just as nervous, Silver. You know why?"

  I shook my head in response, watching his eyes soften and his face light up with happiness.

  "You already know that I have an ex. A person who was similar to Callister in many ways. She may have not necessarily taken advantage of me sexually, but she was very controlling, demanding, and wanted me to do everything perfectly. On the outside, I always had to appear confident, but deep in here—" he used my hand to pat his chest, right over his heart "—I was a nervous wreck. All that would run through my mind was everyone's expectations of me, and in return, that made the other me anxious, and more importantly, angry."

  "Angry," I repeated.

  "Yes. Hellhounds are shifters that not only rely on their sense of smell but also their inner emotions. Their confidence in themselves allows them to make decisions that aren't hindered by second guesses or lack of information. However, when they begin to doubt, and their thoughts are tainted with negativity, it leads them on a destructive path. Maybe to you, something as simple as being nervous about expectations is nothing that will have a negative impact on you as a human witch. However, if it turns out you do have hellhound traits, that's something I want us to avoid at all cost," he revealed.

  "It's that bad?" I would have never guessed hellhounds went through such emotional troubles and challenges. I glanced at his hair, and the memory of his sad flickering eyes flashed within my mind.

  Reaching out with my free hand, I grazed his short strands of black to flame highlighted hair, the glowing essence of it looking extra cool in the moonlit room.

  "Is that the real reason why you cut your hair?" I inquired hesitantly. "Like...in terms of why for a few seconds, you looked really sad when I asked about it earlier?"

  His eyes closed for some seconds, but I kept quiet, unsure whether Dimitri would switch to his other personality or not.

  "My mom's death anniversary is approaching." His voice was barely audible but the pain that coursed through his revelation made my heart sink.

  Just like my dad's.

  I decided to follow my gut, wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling him into a comforting hug.

  He didn't need to say anymore or explain the need to change things up. I completely understood, and I hoped my actions communicated that.

  I listened to him inhale deeply as he hugged me back, lifting me into his lap and keeping me closely pressed against him. This wasn't due to a desperate sexual connection, but a mutual emotional bond through physical presence.

  I could recall all the times I stood alone, staring at the empty hospital bed in my dreams during that crucial time when my dad had first passed away.

  When mourning someone, or even acknowledging that they were no longer returning to the world we live and breathe in, you didn't crave the words, condolences, or sympathetic responses.

  You craved the touch a hug could give, a pat on the shoulder, a back rub, or to be cradled as you cried your eyes out. That physical touch that helped you grasp that there was someone physically there for you.

  We stayed like that for a while, using each other's body heat as comfort. I'd noticed that I'd grown hot simply being in his arms, but it wasn't what I considered uncomfortable.

  It was an internal growth in heat, but I wasn't sure where it originated from.